Superhero’s

I am always looking for things to write about. While  I was reading on MyKLove this morning, I came this article: My Superhero Identity and it really hit me in the gut.  I mean…..Who did  you look up to in the superhero world?  Which one was your “Number One Person” ?  I have to admit that I agree with Pastor Joesy about Wonder Woman.  I  did have some of the same thoughts about Wonder Woman.  But to tell you truth, I didn’t identify with a hero at all,  but a little bit  of a villain.

My person was  Cat Woman.  My life kinda mirrors hers, yes, I even stole and made some destruction in my time. Doesn’t most teenagers to some extent? I was a mouse coming up.  I know….Now, that is hard to believe with my loud mouth and direct questions, but I didn’t know how to stand up for myself.  I was always looking for the approval of a man because I never got the approval of my father.  He wanted a boy and I defiantly was not that.  He did teach me to have a firm handshake.  I have be told that I could brake someone’s hand with my handshake.  LOL

Cat Woman  was weak in the first place and a little helpless stepped on mouse who didn’t know how to stand up for herself.  Then the frightful night came and she got taken by the cats, only to awake to a brand new day.  She discovered that she was more with the help of the cats, and that is when she was turned to hurt men because she saw them as the ones that put her down.

I was this weak wallflower  like Cat Woman until a man beat me so bad that I almost lost one of my children and I finally found the courage to call the police and send him to jail.  The judge  then sent me to AL-ANON.  In that first year I finally found that I was not  this weak little thing that most people in my life had told me I was.  I also found out that I had a voice and more strength  to stand on my own two legs without depending on a man for everything.   I took my kids out of a bad situation and tried to raise them on my own.

Now my Superhero is Jesus.  I will follow Him anywhere.  He is my Lord and Savior.  I love Him very much.  God is my Father and is Love.  He is teaching me how to Love better and intimately.  I also love him.  I am filled with the Holy Spirit.  I listen to him all the time so that I can know what God wants me to read in His Word, study and take into my  heart, and what He wants me to do and say and know. Praise the Lord for His grace and mercy!!!

Stopped Smoking TOO Late

Last night I went to the hospital ER for the second tine in as many weeks due to coughing and breathing problems.  Boy,  do I hate the ER., but the coughing had gotten so bad I had lost my breath several times and it has scared me.  It feels like a five pound stone is sitting on my chest and I can’t get any air in my lungs. It’s to the point of actual pain to take a single breath.  After the x-ray and steroids and a 45 breathing treatment,  I was told for the second time that I had a COPD exacerbation and they were sending me home with steroids for five days.  I asked about staying on steroids which are the only thing they have to help, but was told that was up to my Lung Doctor.

I asked what I could do at home to keep from having these exacerbations and was told to stop smoking. and I told her that  I stopped smoking on June 3, 2017 so that was a BIG check! What else? Don’t be around other smokers.  Check! Then it was stuff like taking my medication, eating healthy, and living in a clean environment and so on. That was all a Check!  “Well, the answer is Nothing!” the doctor said, “You just waited too late to stop smoking.  There is just too much damage done to your lungs.”  GREAT!!!!!

These were the worst words that I could have heard.  After having survived Hepatitis C, with a Liver in good condition and few ill effects.  I have also survived childhood abuse with only PTSD.  I am working with the medication to handle the Bipolar and schizoaffective disorders so you see my life is not so bad.  I just need a god-fearing man in it.  But if  I can’t breath what kind of life do I have to look forward to?

Now sitting here in the cruel light of morning, it still looks bad, but I am a god-fearing woman. So I am turning this over to the Lord.  He is my Lord and Savior. “By his stripes we are healed,” Isaiah 53:3 KJV I am claiming this over my lungs and breathing.  I am healed! Praise the Lord.  My God is a merciful God and He will see me through this.  I will praise His name no matter what.

To Complain or Not To Complain?

There are a lot of reasons to complain, but the main reason is pain.  Pain.  It is an interesting word.  It comes in so many different shapes and sizes.  In the Dictionary it means a feeling triggered in the nervous system. What a simple answer for such a complex word that causes so many feelings and emotions and images that come to ones mind and/or heart.  Some people can handle it so easily and others have such a struggle with just a paper cut which is nothing at all much less a busted lip or black eye.   Pain can manifest itself in so many very different ways; physically, sexually, mentally, emotionally and verbally.  It can feel like a pin prick at the tip of your finger, or a sting by a bee, the burn of the flame of fire, the ache of muscles well used, or the tingle of your funny bone after you have hit it on something hard.  If your lucky you only experience pain in one way in one area of your body such as only having mild Migraines.  Unfortunately, I have pain in several different areas and the pain is varied in multiple ways and intensity.  Some of  pain is correctable but not all so  I am classified as in chronic pain.  Chronic pain effects about 86 million people in American.  They range from mild chronic pain to severe chronic pain. Because I’m in the high mild chronic pain, I am on medications, but my pain doctor is trying  nerve blocks to cut down on some of the pain and it is working in some of the areas, but unfortunately not all.

For a long while I was constantly talking about my pain to everyone who would listen and some who wouldn’t. When people  asked me how I was doing, I would actually tell them about all the pain I was in and how depressed I was.  It turned people away from me, even though I didn’t realize it at the time.  I was so self absorbed and wrapped up in my pain-put-upon me wrap.  Finally, a friend who had not cut me off was brave enough to tell me to my face that they were tired of hearing all the negative thoughts that I was saying and to stop complaining.  She also told me that maybe if I didn’t talk about it so much, the pain might not be so bad.

Well, It made me stop and think.   I started thinking about other people for the first time in a long time. Would I like to hear about nothing but someone’s pain everyday, all day, long without stop?  No!  Would I try to do something about it? Yes, if I could.  If I couldn’t,  I’d do what I could for that person and pray for them.  I have started watching my words and trying extremely hard to stop talking about the pain at all , but there are times that the pain is just so bad that it  has to be acknowledged if for no other reason than to ask for pray or when you hit a hole in the road and your head hits the roof for your car.  .

My friend did make me think about the complaining, and I wanted to know what God said about it.   First, I had to define pain and complain as they apply in the Bible. According to the Vine’s Complete Expository Dictionary by W.E. Vine,  in the New Testament of the bible,  pain is both a noun and a verb.  As a noun it can be one of two Greek words; either pono  – “anguish” as in Revelation 16:10 or  ocin – “travail pain” as in Matthew 24:8 or “sorrows” as in 1 Thessalonians 5:3.  As a verb it can be basanizo or “ to rub on the touchstone to put to the test.” In this statement a ” touchstone” is a dark stone used in testing metals.  It can also mean in general “to distress” as in Revelation 12:2.

Now that we have an idea about what the Bible says about pain, let’s look at what it says about complaining.  In the Old Testament there are three different Greek words for complainer or complaint.  There are 1)mempsimoiros means “one who complains” or “complaining of one’s lot” as in Jude16. 2)momphe means “blame” or “occasion of complaint” or “quarrel” as in Colossians 3:13. 3) aitoma means “in charge” or complaints” as in Acts 25:7.

So we know the definitions but do we have the understanding of theses words and can easily use them yet? No! We need to put the definitions into action, so let us look into the Bible and see what God says about these concepts.  After Adam and Eve fall from grace, one of the things that God did was intensify a woman’s labor pains and added painful efforts with children.  Also because of their biting of the apple, we all as well will experience the pain of death.

According to Psalm 142:2 KJV we are suppose to lay complaints at God’s feet. In Isaiah 53 we get a eye opener on how both God and man look at these two concepts. It is clear that even when we were sinners, God loved us.  He took on all our sicknesses and He carries all our pains.  It also shows us as well that man has never treated prophets and men of God very nicely, but we were especially cruel to Jesus.

You have to keep in mind that God did everything for us that he has done not because of anything that  we could have done on this earth or in heaven.  We are born into sin thanks to Adam and Eve.  Not one of us is innocent and that includes babies. We have to stop complaining all the time or thinking that we are entitled to something in this world.  Thank be to God for loving us so much that he took on all our bad stuff so that we may have all of God’s good stuff.  AMEN

 

Nerve Block – Much Better

Wow!  I mean, “Really WOW!!!!”  My head and my neck finally don’t hurt.  I mean it is like a veil of pain has been lifted off my head and completely removed.  That nerve block is suppose to be the one that is really good and will last a long time.  It should take care of my lightning headaches and my neck and right shoulder pain.  It will be nice to be able to raise my right arm over my head without it hurting me…LOL  I might even be able to turn my head without too much pain….WOW!!!!! Even thought This block is suppose to be the best unfortunately there is no cure for the ALMIGHTY MIGRAINE!!!

I really wish they did have a magic cure of migraines.  They are the worst. You can’t move around because you are so sick. You can’t stand light or sound of any kind. You are literally just lying there praying for it to go away because you can’t take any medication because you vomit it up.  Sometimes they are so bad that you get to see things like pink pot-a-dot animals, but that doesn’t happen very often.

Well, I’m really happy that I don’t have one of those thing morning or should  tonight since the sun has not come up yet….lol  Talk to you later. and have a Blessed day!

Continue reading “Nerve Block – Much Better”

Is a Nerve Block Fun?

Now let me begin by saying that Nerve blocks normally work to control the pain they are meant to, but sometimes getting to the relief stage  is a not so smooth ride.  You go through a series of nerve block to locate the right nerves to hit that give you the best relief.  They tell you at the clinic that these blocks are just temporary and will most likely only last a couple days.  I was lucky in that they lasted sometimes as  long as 3 weeks. Sometimes the blocks work and others times not so much.  After several of the short term blocks they will do Radio Frequency blocks which is where they will us electricity to kinda kill the nerves that are causing you the pain.  The only part bad about it is that sometimes the nerves don’t realize they are dead for up to 4-6 weeks later so you’ll still have right after the local wears off.  The great thing about these RF blocks is that they will give you relief for 6-18 months depending on how fast your body builds back the nerves that were “killed>”

In the worse case sometimes after the local wears off, it feels like someone let a Jackass in the procedure room to kick you where they did the block which in my case was the back of my neck. LOL I got a nerve headache which is almost as bad as migraines without the unset stomach.  I have all the other symptoms though.

They also tell you to apply cold on the site which really helps the only problem with that is it stops being cold and as it warms up, the pain gets worse with the heat. You have to take the ice off after only a little while so you only get a little relief and you have to wait between the ice packs so you have to endure so pain for a little while between ice packs, but it’s not as bad as without the  block.

My problem today is that I had a nerve block yesterday in my C2-C5 vertebrae  and it feels like a have a knife stuck in the back of my brain and sparks are coming from the tip all of the time.  Nothing seems  to be helping.  I’ve had this headache since an hour pass the procedure.   I pray my night medications work so at least that would give me some relief.  I’ll see y’all tomorrow. Y’all are in my thoughts and prays.