Transform Your Mind for God

Romans 12:2 NKJV

“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mins, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”

Before you can transform your mind, you have to start every day to humble yourself before the Lord. To humble yourself, you have to first admit and then show your helplessness to follow God on your own, but willing to follow the teachings of Christ as well as acquire His character as your own. You labor in vain if you don’t receive inner power, all that is good, as well as love from God. You can’t love without receiving love from God. God is love and He gives His grace and love only to the humble.

James 4:6 NKJV

“But He gives more grace. Therefore He says:

‘ God resists the proud

But gives grace to humble’ “

God wants you to love and obey Him and also draw close to Him. When you do these things and keep yourselves open up to Him all the time, you can stand on and claim His love, power, and fulfillment.

When you start feeling like you are slipping far away God, you should drop down to your knees and start praying right then and there. First, you humble and then confess to God every sin that could be standing in your way to God. Search your Bible and then wait for the “golden nugget” that God wants you to learn from the “down time”. It might be greater empathy for others, more of God’s character, or even more of His love. Waiting for God/Holy Spirit’s unlimited potential and resurrection power living inside of you is the only way to endure the pain of this world and waiting for the “nugget” that God is wanting to give to you.

II Corinthians 10:5 NKJV

“casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ,”

Now that you are waiting on God, you have to take you ideas, thoughts, imaginations, dreams, and beliefs captive to the obedience of Christ. All your words, actions and emotions come from somewhere inside you. They come from your mind and heart and you can wake each and every morning with the assurance that you have the power to control how you feel, what you say, and how you act during the entire day and night with God’s help. It is a constant adventure and daily war because the closer you are to God the more Satan doesn’t like it. No one is a victim!

Keep God first and you can’t go wrong.

OOOOPPPPSSSS!!!!! Not Again??????

It’s happened again, I think!!!! I’m not sure right now. I hope not because it could mark the end of a very dear friendship that I would hate to loose. If it did happened again then this time we know at least two things for certain. First of all, I didn’t try to commit suicide this time just like before. Secordly, we know what caused it this time which is most likely the same reason that it happened in 2011. It was caused by my new pain medication (Oxycodone/Acetaminophen 10/325). I guess my pain medication doesn’t like playing with my mental drugs.

Now let me start at the beginning of this tale. Back in 2011 around the Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays, my 12 year old daughter had to call an ambulance for me not once but twice due to my getting very sick and out of my mind but the hospital was not sure of why. It was later determined that I had undergone an Altered State of Consciousness caused by a medication mix-up where my conscious mind went to sleep and stayed asleep while my subconscious mind came awake and had a “good old time”. My ex-husbands kept saying that I had attempted suicide which I firmly stood against.

This Christmas, it happened again. I am just now coming out of the worst of it and don’t really know what has happened over the last three weeks. I remember getting the new pain medication, and taking the first dose. After that not much at all until this morning. What I do remember is more like pictures instead of video. I remember a hospital or two. Something about the police and falling down the stairs – a lot. A need to taking care of the animals, but not really wanting to. I must have been in a few fights because I am tender all over my body. Even my head hurts. My ribs on the left side are really tender, but I don’t know how or why. My room is a total mess, but I’m going to get to cleaning it soon.

I pray that 2019 doesn’t continue the way it has started.

“For as you think in your heart, so you are!”

This is a powerful Proverb. It says it all. Proverb 23:7 tells us in plain English that everything is tied into our thoughts and what we are thinking at this very moment. What are you thinking right now? Does it matter? I mean really matter in and to your life at this very moment?  Does it? The answer is a resounding “YES!”

People don’t realize that what they think dictates everything else about them: mood, feelings, words, attitude, behavior, and even actions and therefore reactions.  Your thoughts and therefore your imagination shapes your life.  If you want to change any thing at all about you, you have to start with changing your thinking it first.

Let’s take the number one thing that almost everyone knows about or has tried at least once in their lives: Dieting.  There are so many diets out there that it is hard to choose one. It is just crazy. You don’t know which one will work for you.

Of course, if you are anything like me you choose the one that will cause the least amount  of change to your routine and food intake or eating habits and the easiest to do and if it fits into your budget.  You pick a pill.  Maybe it works for a while so you lose the weight you wanted to and you stop taking the pill. All of a sudden you start gain the weight right back.  You go back on the diet again, but this time it doesn’t work. What do you do? You look for the Next Diet…

Again, you go for the one that offers little change or effort, but doesn’t work.  You are not a gym person so what are you going to do.  You can always jump on the diet bandwagon of those diets where you have to buy their food and never cook your own food again.  Is that what you really want? Are you ready to face the truth? Now?

You need to change your thinking! Then you will lose weight.  Start living healthy, and whole lives. Do some sort of exercise program.  It does not have to be at a gym.  It can be as simple as a yoga/video workout at home. Study and read the Bible about being healthy. It has a lot of things to say about and fill you thoughts with all those good thoughts.  Pray and God will help fill you mind with good thoughts too.

I’ve not had a very good life, but it’s made me the woman I am today.  I was (and still am to a point) a very angry woman. (God’s still working on me.  Praise the Lord) I am now in my 50s and it has taken me until now to know that negativity will slowly kill you.  It will eat you up from the inside.  You can’t love if you are always negative.  You will be miserable in your own little bit of hell and make everyone around you miserble too. There is no hope there either. There is only fear and despear. There is hate there too.  Do you want that?

I don’t want that anymore, but I backslide sometimes and God corrects me sternly, but patiently.  I am blessed with a housemate that is very humble, kind, caring, and forgiving of my faults.  She has helped me more than she will ever know.  She has taught me and most likely will teach me a lot more in the future.  I just pray that I am such a good friend to her.  At least I try to be.

Now Positive thinking is something to grab a hold of  and not let go.  If you start to fill you mind with Bible verses and positive quotes and thoughts which you share with all your friends, you will push all those negative thoughts out of your head then your mood, feeling, words, attitude, behavior, actions and even reactions will change in a more positive way.  You just might start loving people and finding hope again.  People will start to see the change in you, and start gravitating toward you instead of away.  You will get a pep in your step and be a happier person all around.

Don’t worry……Be Happy!

 

 

 

3 Day Quote Challenge: Day 1

Thank you very much goes out to Stuart Tutt of Something to Stu Over for nominating me for this challenge.  I find that it is an interesting challenge especially for someone like me that doesn’t write/post very often.

The rules are simple and as follows:

  1. Thank the person who nominated you.
  2. Post a different quote for 3 days straight, and explain why each one appeals to you.
  3. Nominate at least two new bloggers each day

 

I’ve had an interesting life which has left me with a lot of negative thinking and feelings.  After a lot of seeing doctors over the years and research in God’s Word, I’ve come to the point that I need to change something from negative to positive if I want a more godly life. I started reading the book Deliver Me from Negative Self-Talk.

I chose the following quote:

“An intellectual is someone whose mind watches itself.”

– Albert Camus

This quote really made me stop and think. Thinking in and of itself is both very complicated and simple at the same time.  It is the way that the mind talks.  The book goes on to say that the act of thinking produces thoughts which turns into words leading to actions which creates character.  If your mind is like mine, sometimes it is really hard to even catch a single thought to focus on an turn them into words.

If you are always negative in your thoughts and actions then your life will be negative.  Positive thoughts and actions then will birth a positive life.  You have to change the way that you are thinking to change your character or life.  If I want to be more God-like, then I need to put more of God’s Word in my mind and heart and it will be reflected in my character.

 

Thank you to Stuart for letting me participate in this challenge.  I nominate the following bloggers for this challenge:

  1.  James Edgar Skye,  The Bipolar Writer
  2. Stephanie Jafta, GODINTEREST

For those I nominated, please understand you do not have to participate if you chose not to.  It’s just something fun and challenging.

Journal 2018 – Day 7 – Bipolar and Sexuality

Bipolar Disorder effects all areas of your life but one area I didn’t know it effected much was sexuality. The thing with sex and bipolar is that either you have it in spades and running over or you don’t have an active libido at all. I am of the later which is why I didn’t know it was part of the Bipolar Disorder. A friend of mine didn’t care whom she had sex with, or what kind of sex she had or with how many men she had it with at one time without any protection at all. This kind of reckless sexual activity is called hypersexual behavior is common in Bipolar disorder. Then there is the other side of the coin when another friend of mine had no interest in sex at all. She didn’t want to be touched in any way at all. Not even from her boyfriend. She was fine with cuddles and hugging and kissing, but going further than that made her run out of the door screaming as if she had been touched by a hot poker. As you can see neither one of these situations puts the person in a very good sexual position. The bad thing about the medications for Bipolar Disorder is that it can stop the hypersexual behavior of the Mania phase of the Bipolar disorder but in most cases it will  completely turn their libido off for good.

Some say that Bipolar disorder is the reason for sexual addiction. The two are often difficult to untangle. According to the National Alliance for Mental Illness (NAMI) article “Opening the Door on Hypersexuality,” the prevalence of in the people with bipolar disorder is on average 57%. It involves a significantly heightened sex drive resulting in things like “constantly thinking about sex, a preoccupation with pornography, an abundance of one-night stands, engaging in sex with multiple partners, having random sex, seeking out prostitutes or having multiple affairs even when in a committed relationship.”

Most of these sexual encounters don’t mean anything to the person with Bipolar.  They get momentary pleasure from the experience, but they just crave the act of sex.  They don’t really care where or how they get it.  There is no emotional element to these sex acts. When this disorder has disrupted a person’s life almost totally, that person might become a prostitute to hide their sexual appetite.  This way they  can have as much casual, meaningless sex they want.

People with Hypersexuallty are often more likely to try more risky sexual positions and experiences such as being tied up and blind folded. Masters and Servants are also games that can be played as well as the use of whips and chains.  There is one game that even I am willing to play and as stated above I’ve got no libido, and that game is Dirty Minds.  I’d check it out if you want a little fun.

I hopw that I have given you something to think about.  You can’t always judge a book by its cover.

Jeremiah 29:11 Misunderstood?

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.”

Jeremiah 29:11  (KJV)


In other versions of the Bible the word, “thoughts” are changed to the word, “plans”.  This seems like a straightforward, direct, no holds bar, statement on the outside.  Let us look on the inside.  This statement sounds out of context like God is talking to every single person individually.  Let’s take a look at Jeremiah 29:4 (KJV)) and test this fact;

“Thus saith the Lord of hosts, the God of Israel, unto all that are carried away captives, whom I have caused to be carried away from Jerusalem unto Babylon;”

Do my eyes deceive me? Does that look like a one or all?  By George I think is talking to ALL His people instead of just one person at a time.  I guess God can get tired of saying the same thing over and over again.  (LOL)  So the you in Jeremiah 29:11 is not meant for an individual but for all of God’s people.  Isn’t it grand that God knows our thoughts before we do?

Okay, let’s look at something else that may surprise you even more.  There was a condition on this promise.  Let’s look at Jeremiah 29:10 (KJV);

“For thou saith the Lord, that after seventy years be accomplished at Babylon I will visit you, and perform my good word toward you, to causing you to return to this place.”

Did I read that right? God’s wasn’t coming right then?  He’s going to make His people wait?  Why?  Because it was better for His people?  How is waiting better for his people?  Maybe they needed to get their act together.  Maybe  they needed to grow during this time of captivity and learn things. The important thing is that after 70 years, God came to carry them away to  Jerusalem.  They had to go through the storm of Babylon before they can reap the glory of God.

The storms are going to come, but God will bring you through them.  I have found myself having  to go through the storm a lot more often than not before I got to where God wanted me to be.  Of course, that might be because I grew up learning things at the University of Hard Knocks and didn’t really start listening or paying attention to advice from others until I was in my 30’s and 40’s.  What can I say?  I’m a preacher’s kids…..LOL

Even though this was a “you-do / me-do”  from a very long ago, it is still in effect today.  All God wants us to do is LOVE HIM and put HIM FIRST IN OUR LIVES. OBEY HIM and, let HIM TAKE CONTROL for change.  I know how hard it is to GIVE CONTROL OVER TO GOD because it’s the  one area that I am having the most trouble in.  I Like my control (LOL).  But it’s better His Way!  He wants to love us and take care of us and have only good things for us instead of all the bad that is in the world today.  We are here to show Jesus to the World.  Are you showing Jesus or something/someone else?

Prayer:

God, how I love You!!  You are way too good for me.  Please forgive me of my sins.  Thank You for everything that You do for me.  Thank You for keeping me safe for all these years and for all the years to come.  Thank You for all the blessings that You have given me and anyone reading this and all the ones in the future.   You are the Great Healer, Lord.  Please restore health to me and take away this pain.  “I didn’t earn it.  I don’t deserve it, but You give Yourself away.”  (from the song, “Reckless Love”).  Praise be to the Father, The Son, and The Holy Sprit. In Jesus Name I Pray, Amen.

Have a Blessed Day!!!!

 

 

Journal 2018 – Day 2 – My Diagnosis

Since the last journal entry was about my PTSD I thought that this one should be about my Diagnosis.  I was first diagnosis Manic Depressive when I was 22, which was a long time ago. More than half my lifetime to tell the truth. At first it was all depression. I was not sleeping at all. then crashing for a day or two then back up for an entire week before crashing once again. This was not good for me or my new husband. It didn’t help that he was in the Navy and working a job that kept him away from the house 16 hours a day every day for 7 days straight with varying breaks depending on shift that he was working on that week. I was left alone at the house with no one. He was a student Naval Officer so there was no Wives Club, yet. By the time he got home all he wanted was food and sleep and get up and do it all over again the next day.

The first thing they tried to straighten out was my sleep because without good sleep your moods are going to be out of whack anyway. The problem was that my body was adjusting to the medications too fast and they would stop working and I would stop going to sleep. Then we had to move and it was another doctor and different medications.

You see as with any mental illness, getting the medication right is a hit and miss, trial by error situation. You start off trying this and seeing if it works and adjusting as you go along. some medication will work on one patient, but not on another because we are all different. I cannot tell you the number of medications that I have been on since I was first diagnosis. It would blow your mind. And this is the longest I’ve been on the same medication in a while, 8 months with only a change in dosage.

When the Doctors On High changed Manic Depressive to Bipolar I where was no II at the time and it said that you had to be Manic (not happy but very active in the mind and body) for days . I was Manic for hours not days but mostly depressed with trouble sleeping so they changed my diagnosis to Major Depressive Disorder (MDD). Between all the moving around as a Naval wife, then the divorce and moving and marriage, and divorce, and marriage and divorce and moving around all the time and having had several doctors and a whole lot of medication, It’s a wonder I’m not dead yet! LOL

About two years ago my then doctor for some unknown reason yelled at the top of her lungs to me that I was no longer MDD but Bipolar II, PYSD, and schizoaffective and she never wanted to see me again. She gave me enough medication for three months which gave me enough time to find another doctor. Schizoaffective is schizophrenia with a mood disorder like mania or depression. I finally found the doctor that I now have and love. He lets me have an active role in my illness instead of just telling me what medications to take, I tell him what’s going on and he gives me options and let’s me choose for myself. This is a first and I like it. After a while seeing him, I asked if he really thought I was schizoaffective and he agreed with me that I was not schizoaffective because I didn’t have the hallucinations and delusions of schizophrenia. I know about schizophrenia because my mother has it. But he would not change what another doctor had done. So I guess I’m stuck with it.

Bipolar II is a form of bipolar disorder characterized by depressive and hypomanic periods. Hypomanic periods are at least four days of either elevated moods or irritable mood with periods of pressured speech, inflated self-esteem or grandiosity, decreased need for sleep. It is less severe than mania. It has similar symptoms with elevated mood and increased activity. Hypomania is a pleasurable state. It many confer a heightened sense of creativity and power. It can be hard to diagnose be it masquerades as mere happiness. Because it is an important part of the Bipolar disorder, it may cycle into depression.

Now you have to whole drawn out story of my journey so far with mental illness. Actually, My journey started a long time before I came to be 22. I have dealt with mental illness all my life, but it wasn’t my mental illness. It was my mother’s, but that is another story. Praise the Lord!